Oogly Boogly

Mental note: Don't watch scary movies before going to bed.

I don't like scary movies as a rule. The only exception I made to this rule was Blair Witch Project, and I only did that because I liked the concept. And make no mistake: it scared the bejesus out of me.

It was playing on Space last night, so I watched part of it. In the dark. Right before going to bed. Bad move.

The only thing that saved me was that I also watch the sequel to it which was God-Awful. Even a scardey-cat like myself was not put-off by this film (okay, so I switched channels on the gut-stabbing parts).

At least Newton curled up in his familiar spot next to me. Aside from the comfort factor, not having the cat making noises in the rest of the house is Bump In The Night factor I don't have to deal with. Yes... at 33 years old, I'm still scared of the dark.

Stood Up ... Feel Low

Josephine called me today and asked me to help her put up signs that promote her candidacy. I was so conflicted that I didn't know what to say.

In the end, I said no. No, I won't help you put up your posters. I hoped that it would end there, but of course she asked me why, so I told her.

I only hear from you when you need help. I've supported you through a myriad of crisis' in your life and I've gotten very little back. The few times I extended a hand of help, you've taken it and smacked me with it at some point. I feel that you're taking advantage of my generous nature in the name of friendship. I have to put a stop to this.

At first she laughed and cajoled me, but I said "You think this is funny, but I'm serious." That calmed her down and she listened. In the end, she said "Although I have no memory of these events, I'm sorry I hurt your feelings. I won't ask you for help anymore. Good-bye."

I knew I had to do this. I couldn't let it go on. When I see her next, she'll probably freeze me in place with a look. If this was the right thing to do, why do I feel like crap?

A Window to the World

Just as in September 11th, when New York Bloggers shared their uncensored news with the world, Raed is providing an insider's view on the War in Iraq. There's nothing like actually being there.

At least this blog isn't Pentagon approved (I hope).

When Words Fail Me

I've been trying to spend more time in my home in the evenings for both financial and relaxation reasons. Of course, this means I'm home to receive bizarre calls like this one.

I mainly have dealings with Josephine when we randomly bump into each other in the city. The other time I will hear from her is if she wants to complain about her life or if she needs something from me. For this reason, I do not keep in close contact with the girl. It's just too draining.

She recently moved into my neighborhood, so I bumped into her during St. Paddy's Day weekend. She called me up the other night and asked me for a favour. I told her to come on over for tea, which she did (I don't receive enough visitors).

Over tea, she tells me about a request that she received from a friend. It seems this friend has a nephew who's visa papers are about to expire and would Josephine be willing to marry him for two days in exchange for a few thousand dollars. "So, should I do it?" she asks me, sipping her cup non-chalantly.

I'm sure most of you have seen LOTR: Fellowship. You know that scene in the mines of Moria where Gandalf is squaring-off against the Balrog? If he were to say "No" instead of "You Shall Not Pass", it would've sounded like the resounding "No" I gave to Josephine.

Incredulously, and bit taken aback from my reaction, Josephine looks up from her cup and inquires "Why not?" Imagine much spluttering and failing words. I can't believe I'm going to have to explain why this is a bad idea.

Now aside from obvious legal and personal ramifications of playing such a game with Immigration, I must mention that Josephine is seriously considering running for local office for one of the political parties. When I mention that there can be some serious political impact to her credibility as a policitian for that whole "breaking the law for money" thing, she shrugs it off and says "Oh... that's just American law. I want to be a Canadian politician. It's not the same. Why should I care about their piddly rules?"

Again, words are failing me, so I take a final stab at trying to dissuade her from this course of action. I take the morality angle, the legal angle, the political angle. Nothing. In fact, she just looks at me bemused and says "I can't believe you're such a square. Everybody does it, the laws have been put in place by corrupt people, so it's not really a moral crime to break them, and I really need the money."

I hate being called a square. This is when I suddenly remember the last time Josephine called me a naive square because I wouldn't defraud my insurance company when I got robbed (I know I blogged about this, but I can't remember the date). I promptly gave up, collected the tea, and said I needed to get to bed.

I don't think Josephine will go through with this idea, but it blows my mind that 1) she would even consider it and 2) she thinks I'm a knob because I wouldn't consider it.

It's times like these when I feel truly alone. Either that, or I'm surrounded by idiots. Either way, I've got no one to talk to.

Oscar Soapbox

Okay... I don't blame Michael Moore for using the Oscar podium as a soapbox for his anti-war tirade. He pretty much had to, especially considering he had to go to Canada to get his movie put together (no one in the States would touch him). If he had gone up there and gushed a whole lot of thank-yous, it would've been a complete sell-out and against everything he's ever said.

But even then, I think he went a bit too far. He should have stopped at the "fictitious election/president/war" statement, 'cause after that, he just came off as a pretentious lunatic. Even he should know that when it comes to the camera, less is definitely more (or Moore, if you're so pun inclined).

Although I was impressed that Aiden Brody was able to stop the music for him to get his acceptance speech out, he lost his momentum somewhere along the way. Always prepare your speech, whether you know you're going to win or not. Still, anyone who thinks he can make-out with Halle Berry in exchange for a naked gold statue definitely doesn't have confidence issues.

I wonder if Berry could bring Brody up on sexual assault charges for that? She looked none too impressed standing off to the side, waiting for him to get to the point.

As Oscars go, it was a pretty subdued event over all. I'm going to have to see The Pianist, Far From Heaven, and Y Tu Mama Tambien, since they got nominated in almost everything.

Toons

I've always been a huge animation fan, especially the traditional 2D stuff. 3D animation is great too, but it just doesn't have the same magic. Animation studios are just now getting the hang of blending the 2D and the 3D animations together so that you're not distracted by the technology. Disney's Hercules is an example of what happens when this DOESN'T blend.

Saturday mornings, I've taken to taping 1.5 hours of animation on YTV which consiste of X-Men Evolution, Justice League, and Samurai Jack. The YTV Saturday line-up of cartoons are pretty well-selected.

But on one particular Justice League episode, they threw in an exchange between two superheroes that I thought was pretty daring for a Saturday morning cartoon show. Let me provide you with some context:

In this episode, Hawkgirl, Flash, J'onn J'onzz, and Green Lantern accidentally get transported to an alternate universe. In this universe, there are a bunch of superheroes too (called the Justice Guild who bear an uncanny resemblance to DC's Justice Society), but they spout out the corny lines and dialogue that was more commonly found in comic books from the 1950's.

In one scene, Green Lantern (aka John Stewart (see photo)) and the Streak (a Flash look-alike) are having a quick conversation before battling the bad guy. It goes like this:

GL: It's an honour to fight by your side.
S: The feeling is mutual. You're a credit to your people son.
GL: (looking uncomfortable) Ummm... Thanks.

I wonder if the writers had to debate this exchange with their managers or the censoring board (do they still have censors?).

Looooooooming

I had my first restless night in wartime. First of many, I'm sure.

With the new business stress weighing on my mind, I can't be dealing with the constant thoughts of the repercussions of this Blood for Oil war. It will stop me dead in my tracks and I won't be able to get the stuff I need to have done done.

Although this letter from Michael Moore to Mister Bush made me feel a bit better (thanks Blork). No one's buying into your company line Mr. Bush. The World is not made up of the sheep you expected to find. You'd make a rotten shepherd: "No you damn sheep... Come here! Here! Come here!" (pardon the Fawlty Towers reference).

So I'm taking a moment to thank the Gods every morning I can wake up in my house successfully without cellophane and duct tape on my windows.

Just Finish a Sentence!

Ever talk to someone like this?

So this is what happened: I was walking down the... No wait, before that I... Okay, you need to understand that yesterday I was talking to... By the way, I really like that hat! It so suits you! It's just like my mum who is the... Have you heard from your mum lately? Anyways, I'm getting off track. I do that all the time, like the time I was talking to this guy and he... well first, you need to know that at the time I was dating Brian who... Did you meet Brian? Weird, 'cause he had nothing but good things to say about you! Or was that Ellen? Anyways, I was walking down the street and I saw... well, you know what I mean.

No! I have no idea what you mean! It's like someone has a remote control and is changing this person's topic channels every 10 seconds.

Sorry... I can only hang onto so many subplots before I start losing track of the thread of the story. All the attention span of a bug zapper.

And Gods help you if you ask her to re-explain. My only advice is to get yourself comfortable and make yourself a sandwich.

It's Not Easy Feeling Green

Another successful St. Patrick's Day has come and gone and, according to tradition, I took the Monday following parade day off.

It's uncanny how the weather for parade day has been consistently warm and pleasant for the last five years or so. St. Patrick's Day is one of those few all inclusive celebrations where everyone is just happy. The warm weather certainly helps, but there's also a sense of infectious camaraderie that takes hold of everyone who attends. It's a big social event and every year, I meet new and interesting people.

Other than La Fete de la St. Jean and Canada Day (which have more obvious political overtones), I can't think of a celebratory day that brings more people together. Of course, those two celebrations kinda state the obvious (Canada Day celebrations for Canadians living in Canada), so it tends to dilute the enthusiasm. As Spirit of the West said "There's none more Scots than the Scots Abroad" (apply Irish liberally in this statement).

Now I can understand how some people view the day with cynicism. There's a darker side to the holiday as well that can lead to drunkeness and consequently, boobery. I heard that there was a rumble that took place outside of Hurleys, a stabbing on Crescent, and what people leave behind on the streets is just shameful.

But I prefer to focus on the positive side to the celebration. I was able to meet with friends (both old and new), share a laugh and a story or two over a pint, listen to some fantastic music, and even get my famous Irish Kiss.

Works for me.

P.S.: Haloscan's having some trouble with their commenting servers, so some of the more recent posts were temporarily lost. They assure me that they'll be cleaning this up shortly, so write-up your comments on a post-it note and stay tuned.

Conflicted

I'm not sure what to blog about today. On the one hand, I could say a thing or two about the upcoming St. Patrick's Day celebration (Paul's got a bee in his bonnet about all the Guinness advertising, which I have to concede the point to him).

On the other hand, I could blog about how it feels to be dumped (yet again) by Drew. Unfortunately, I don't know how to blog about that issue without it coming off as whiney. I don't think there is a way to do that and besides, who would want to read about it? I sure wouldn't.

Despite the fact that many people see SPD as only an excuse to drink to excess, it's also a great time to meet people (everyone's in a sociable mood), listen to fantastic celtic music, and take part in other forms of celtic culture (storytelling, dance, art). There's a movement in Pagan circles to have us wear snake buttons to celebrate the fact that St. Patrick didn't completely eradicate *all* the snakes from Ireland (you didn't think they were real snakes, did you?).

But if you'd rather whine about how Guinness is just using the holiday to make money, then I'd better not see you eating chocolate at Easter, buying flowers on Mother's Day, buying a tie for Father's Day, carousing around an open bonfire on St. Jean Baptiste Day, hanging up cardboard skeletons on Halloween, stuffing a turkey on Thanksgiving, stringing up lights on a plastic tree on Christmas, or buying heart-shaped boxes of chocolate on Valentines day.

This blog was brought to you today by Guinness, Hersheys, Canada Florists, Molsons, Jean Coutu, Butterball, Canadian Tire, and Hallmark.